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liuxue ---------> riben riji


今年もつれづれなるままに・・・
by liuxue
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2006年 02月 25日 ( 2 )

more pleasure in loving than in being loved?

There is a saying "There is more pleasure in loving than in being loved.", but my Chinese friend and I believe opposite should be better.

I went to see one of Chinese friends, and heard her story when she was in Japan several years ago.
At that time, she was just 18 years old, and worked day and night.
She had a Chinese boyfriend, and he took care of her very much, had her dressed well, cooked meals for her, and went to pick her up when she came back very late after work. However, she didn't really care about his affection, and she often went out with other guys. She realized she was so bad to him at that time. There are few guys who can give his very best to her.

When I think of myself, there was a few guys who were very nice to me, but I missed them.
They were always so nice to me, but I didn't appreciate it much. I don't know it's just a coincidence, but they are all Cancer(kani) in zodiac sign, and two of them would have told me "I would be happy if you are happy." What a shame!

The Chinese friend said to me, "Generally speaking, I think Japanese guys are not really sincere and nice enough to their girlfriends."
"Yeah, compared with Chinese guys, they are less thoughtful to girlfriends, of course, there are some nice guys, though."
She knows a lot of Japanese guys go to "fuzoku" , also knows Chinese guys around her in Japan were the same.
"Some people date 2,3 girls at once, or some Japanese staff stationed in China or Asia often go to the bars that provide 'entertainments' or go to hookers."
She said to me disappointedly, "Youmei, you should find a Chinese boyfriend. It is much happier than being with them throughout this life!"

She strongly persuaded me to find a Chinese boyfriend, but I don't think it is realistic at the moment.

In the end, we both agree that we should find the guys who really care about us. "There is more pleasure in being loved than loving."
I should find someone who is a Cancerian and all nice to me.
by liuxue | 2006-02-25 21:07 | 話題huati

仕事と恋愛の似ているところ

恋愛の相手選びと同時に、仕事選びに常に苦戦している私ですが、
ふと共通点を見出した。

あまり好きでもない相手には連絡を渋るところ。
これは自分が相手(または求職する会社)に対する態度、相手が自分に対する態度ともに言える。
確かに、仕事を探していたときに、熱烈に来てほしいというところは、すぐに連絡が来るし、私もすぐ連絡を返す。
相手に対する誠実さ、思いやりまたは思い入れともいえるだろうか。

というのも、だいぶ前に面接に行ったIT会社から部長面接に来てほしいとメールをもらっているにもかかわらず、新学期が始まってバイトと授業の時間以外に、街中に出る時間が取れなかったという理由もあるが、遠すぎて尻込みしている。それに先方の部長も忙しくてなかなか私の空き時間と合わないらしい。

今の徐家匯に通うのも1時間ほど、人民広場のそのオフィスまでなら1時間半はみないといけない。(徒歩含む)
人民広場に便利なところに住むことも考えたが、閔行の授業には行かなくなりそう。
向こうの会社は私が上海に残ることを期待して、インターンなりバイトに来てほしいと思っているが、私がこの夏以降上海に残る率は今のところほぼ0%。

それに、最初は今学期もっと仕事をメインにしようと思っていたが、
授業も出たくなってきたし、今の週3ぐらいのバイトがちょうどいい。

昨日、ふと、残された期間に上海でしか学べないことを学ぶべきかも・・・と考えも起きてきて
上海語とか中華料理とかも少し習ったほうがいい思い出になるかな、と。
というのも、交通大学の語学班に選択科目があって、上海語や料理など、興味のある内容があったからだ。お金を払わないといけないが、10元とか材料費だけなので、格安。

話はずれたが、いつこの考えを先方に告げるべきか・・・考えあぐねて1週間。
そろそろ決断を伝えなければ。
by liuxue | 2006-02-25 05:49 | 話題huati
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